Darkness & gloom

I’d like to say that despite my inability to train, I remained focused and determined. Afraid it just isn’t so. From the very day I left England, I began sliding on slope lubricated by alcohol and mischief. As injuries plagued my campaign to become a sweet, real life ninja, I continued to slide. Inch by inch. Meter by meter. I left Phuket with a motive to sit tight and gather my thoughts. This also did not go to plan, I found myself swept up in a inexplicably frenetic rush. I flew from Phuket to Kuala Lumpur, flew from KL to Bangkok, flew from Bangkok to Phuket, bused from Phuket to Bangkok, bused from Bangkok to Pattaya, Pattaya to Bangkok….and now here I am panting in semi-exhaustion and severe confusion. There is so little sense in the above travel routes that it makes my face hurt. Especially Pattaya. Never will you find a more wretched hive of scum & villainy.

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So it turns out that Pattaya is the sex capitol of Thailand and home to a thousand old white guys and a numberless horde of young Thai girls. My brief time there was a fascinating insight into the stranger side of humanity. I (perhaps foolishly) went for a massage & in the space of an hour I had two different guys have sex on the mattress next to me. My masseuse was genuinely confused by my lack of sexual intentions & greatly amused by my reactions to the comings & goings of the establishment. Even though I don’t like Pattaya, I don’t want my opinions to seem high & mighty. I have seen and done many strange things in my time, and no doubt have many more wacky and unpredictable adventures ahead of me. Being human is an ugly business. It isn’t neat or pretty all the time. Even simple matters like eating & mating for us inevitably are messy and often embarrassing affairs. These squishy meat-puppets endowed with consciousness are imperfect things. And fascinatingly so. I’m glad I went to Pattaya, even if I never intend to return.

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One of the best parts of the past few crazy weeks was (against all odds) my return to Phuket. It was brief and very expensive, but it allowed me to watch 2 friends hop into the ring & flail their enemies with Muay Thai. It was amazing to watch my Thai trainer/ drinking partner (weirdest combo ever right?) absolutely decimate his opponent in the first right using a vicious combination of angry right hooks and horrifying elbow strikes. I had drank and smoked so much with the man that I was secretly doubting his combative abilities. How wrong I was.
I also had the pleasure of watching a Swedish training partner jump into the ring & fight like crazy for 5 rounds. I love to watch fighting, in all it’s forms, but the experience is enhanced so very much when someone you really know is in that ring. I cheered and screamed like crazy, I was spouting absolute innate drivel by the end of the fight. I think I actually proposed to her from the stands at the end of round three. Sadly sporadic marriage offer was lost in the din and roar of the crowd, but we did laugh about it in the post fight drinking.

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Ahhh drinking. Too much drinking. Be warned if you ever come to Bangkok, this is a dangerous place for thirsty folk. Fun, but your wallet will take a savage beating. I know mine has. So much so that, I must change my initial plans and take the slow road back to paid employment. A heartbreaking notion, but I think that’s where things stand. I have not wanted to admit it, planning has been slow and reluctant. Perhaps that is why I have been so sluggish in typing this blog. It all stings, right in the pride.
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From the shadows amongst broken dreams, with a great weariness & much failure.

Peace, Love & a hope of one day seeing Triangles again…

Scotty