Two weeks in the sun and rain of tropical Thailand. Two weeks living on-site at Tiger Muay Thai , the largest Muay Thai gym in the country, possibly the world. Yet sadly I STILL have not managed to set foot on the mats or even lace up a glove. My cursed Ringworm clings on, stubbornly refusing to die, leaving me unable to participate in training or join in any Reindeer games. I have managed to acquire some peeling skin from too much sun though. Might even get a tan yet? Other than that it would be fair to say that thing are not going to plan. Having a contagious skin condition whilst living at a martial arts camp is not a fun situation. I feel unclean, a bit like a leper.
I find myself extremely reluctant to socialise under the circumstances, which is a shame as I am undoubtedly surrounded by fascinating people. The camp, though obviously male dominated, also hosts a surprising number of females. Most of whom could beat me senseless and take my lunch money.
The past two weeks have been plagued by notions of being ready to train and repetitious thoughts of how long recovery will take. In a few days I should be ready. Hopefully by the weekend. Maybe next week?
Setting imaginary deadlines in my mind and failing to reach them over and over again. This has been going on in my mind since the beginning of May, when this whole fiasco started. Will I heal in time to train before the BJJ Globetrotters camp? Will I recover before Denmark? Before Thailand? Frankly, it’s exhausting. Just like worrying over anything outside of your control, a thorough misuse of mental energy. And although I feel I have realised that fact from the beginning, knowing and doing are two completely different things. But everyday I seek to make peace with my situation, knowing it is temporary. Knowing I am doing everything I can. And knowing, that with any perspective even slightly removed from my own little world….that it really isn’t a big deal. Maybe I won’t actually get to train at Tiger this time around. That would be a shame. A disappointment. But that’s all. Life is full of disappointment. It’s easy to be happy when things are going your way. Easier to be kind or friendly or generous. But why should happiness depend on external sources? Isn’t there so much to be happy about in just being here? Just being on Earth with all the rainbows, sunshine and sea creatures? Sunsets every day, sleeping every night. Everyday another wacky adventure amongst the crazy people of Earth.
Undoubtedly amazing stuff, but not always so easy to appreciate. All too often we get bogged down in thoughts of the future or past and completely miss the present, where you know, we actually live. All too often we get caught up in the ‘normal’ routine and forget about the sunsets. I am as guilty as any for this, which is a shame because I love sunshine and rainbows.
Yet I promise I will try not to whine too much more about my shitty little first world problem. I have 2 weeks left in this fascinating country & I aim not to spend them moaning.
So enjoy the sunsets boys and girls. Enjoy the stars or the Moon. Or your sexy sexy lover. Just enjoy something. Enjoy today and I will do the same.
Peace. Love. Triangles. (and just a little bit of Ringworm)